The last time I postes was in 2018, December 3rd and today is February 4th 2020 and I am well aware of how long the time jump is.
Since I last posted World War 3 went trending, Prince Harry left the Royal Family, Rihanna still hasn’t released music, Trump got impeached and now there is a new virus outbreak. There is a lot catching up but now that I think of it, the reason I have been held back from posting blogs was because I focused too much on posting the junks I went through throughout the time I have not posted. And that always left me with a ton of drafts left hanging mid-sentence.
Now that I learned my mistake, I’m not going to do any catching up but I will tell you a major move I made in my life.
With 9 months of contemplating, revising my thought proses and doubts, by May 2019 I had made the decision to move to the tropical archipelago called Indonesia.
It was hard, honestly. You don’t just develop a life in a place for 3 years and leave it in a snap. And when making a decision so big like that, not everyone is going to agree with your decision. So what I went through was either immense support or discouragement. Either way, I made sure I knew what I wanted before making my way to tell everyone about the huge decision. I made sure I knew the consequences and I made sure I knew what I was leaving, as well as what I was going to be receiving.
I knew I was starting my life from scratch. No friends and a part of my family I barely had contact with (because, well, they were an ocean away). I hardly knew whether I was going to have fun but I made sure I let myself know that, too. There were great risks and I’m proud that I was thoughtful enough to have considered the risks. Usually, I am the type to go for it when a choice to go after what I always wanted is given. And to my surprise, I stepped back and throught for a second.
My family there hated me for leaving. I was studying in a pretty decent private high school with a tuition fee of five grand a year. I had a great chance to go to gollege in the United States and major in IR like I always wanted. But somewhere along the way, I got lost. I didn’t want to go to the US and didn’t really want to go to school at that expensive school anymore.
The feeling of getting a grade lower than 80 haunted me. Especially when I always kept in mind that the school was five grands.
I cannot be getting bad grades when my prents are paying for this expesive school.
So going to school was ended up being for money. It was toxic and that played a big part in me making my decision to move.
But being a mixed gal played a big part, too. My father’s native Indonesian and Indonesia doesn’t allow dual-citizenship after the age of 17. So by the time I turn 17, I have to have chosen what citizen I was going to be. I knew very well I was choosing Indonesia but I thought, I can’t just suddenly go there after graduating. The education system was far different hence the reason why I came a little bit early.
The first week of coming here, great doubt washed over me. The moment I arrived in Soekarno-Hatta Int’l Airport to the moment I arrived to where I am now, I was always on the brink of tears. I regretted solely because of culture shock. Thankfully, that only lasted for a week and after that whole week full of mental breakdowns, I was ready to start a new life.
I hope I can elaborate on the difference of “teenage culture” in Mongolia and in Indonesia and how I’m holding it up here but I’m afraid I can only elaborate on how the moving proses was. Until then, I hope you hold up well, too.